2007-03-16

paintedgray at 5:58 a.m.

free hugs

there is a black cat that has stretched herself across my knee as she dangles onto my keyboard.

today i wandered around outside the EMU with a sign FREE HUGS. i easily gave over 20 hugs, and hopefully made someones day a little bit better. some recipients asked me why i was i giving out free hugs--i said it was to promote positive energy and to spread love into the universe.

i do not think about my parents often. i talk to them even less. when i allow myself to think about my mom i always end up in tears. i dont know why its so painful to think about her and her current life. it pains me even more to think about the past and our life together. first there was three--me, my mother, and my father. my father left and then there was two--my mother, and me. and then there was one--my mother, left alone in a 4 bedroom house all by herself just because her 17 year old daughter couldn't handle such an unstructed household.

was i selfish to move out so abruptly? yes.

i left my mother all alone with no choice other than to move to alaska to seek solace from her lonliness.

here i go with the tears. and yet its cleansing to the soul.

now i really need a hug.

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